Just For Today

At this time of year, many people are making New Year's resolutions. You also see many who are regretting that they never completed LAST YEAR'S resolutions. So, since God doesn't promise us tomorrow, why not try decluttering your life from anger, frustration, bitterness, and other negative, hurtful emotions that seem to build up so quickly into mountains that seem unconquerable. Here's how:

JUST FOR TODAY, block that frustration which comes from the little things, like annoying porn text messages, frustrating fb game requests, recorded phone sales pitches (in recent months I've gotten more than 50 of these calls just telling me I need a security system on my home. That's not counting the recorded calls I've received for sales pitches for other products. And it's not to mention those I get asking for my vote during political seasons!) Let go of that irritation you feel when somebody pulls in front of you to take that parking space that you've been waiting for, and on and on. JUST FOR TODAY, refuse to entertain those little things that you can do nothing about. Refuse to give place in your mind to those annoying little things that even reporting them to the authorities doesn't help. 

JUST FOR TODAY, take all the time and energy you spend on those annoyances that would threaten to ruin your day, and think about your priorities instead. What's important to you? What's the most important thing on your list to accomplish TODAY? Forget about the minor irritations. They're holding you back from accomplishing that one little thing that would turn out to be a life changer for you or for someone else. All this, JUST FOR TODAY. 

If you falter, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back to trying all over again. God doesn't promise us tomorrow, but you'll be amazed at how much extra time you'll have on your hands today, and what can happen in your life if those little annoyances are disregarded.

You want peace in the world? It begins with YOU! One day at a time.

Are Grieving and Depression Related?

Absolutely! They are related, but not necessarily the same thing. I've seen many blogs and on-line articles lately about the difference between grief and depression, and I do recognize and understand that grief & depression can have a wide range of causes, symptoms and stages. Grief or depression can extend from an ordinary case of the "blahs," to life-impairing, life-threatening depressive episodes for which medication is necessary. Obviously, there's a difference between those two examples. However, grief is not solely caused by the death of a loved one, nor is "death" solely related to the physical cessation of life. There are as many causes for grief as there are people in the world and negative things for us to experience. Having been through the deaths of seventeen immediate family members and close friends, I found that the tragic events that were occurring in LIFE, were just as devastating. The symptoms and stages of grief and depression can be very similar, and the treatment can be the same as well.

In addition, with all the articles I read about the difference between grief & depression, if there is one ... how long should a person be "allowed" to grieve before it is considered a major depressive episode, etc ... not one article that I've seen addressed the Biblical view of grief. (See "The Biblical View of Grief & Depression" here in this blogspot for a description of how God sees grief.) We see many "descriptions" of how we "should" feel & behave after a traumatic event, via the entertainment industry. I believe we need something way more stable than the entertainment industry to help us make it through the aftereffects of a tragedy. We need God. And His Word.

Grief and depression are not easy maladies to work through. Although healing is possible, restoration may not be. If, for example, your loved one has passed on, or if a tornado or hurricane has destroyed your home and worldly possessions, the restoration of those people and things are not possible. But you CAN be healed. And it IS possible to grow from these situations, and even to have good come out of them. Nothing can change what has already occurred in the past. But the important thing to remember is that it's possible to remove the "sting" out of the past, so that it no longer has control over your future! Maybe even to the point that it then becomes a testimony!

How Gullible Are You!?!

I just gotta say ... I can't believe how gullible we are!

Yesterday morning on Good Morning America, they did a story about a young man who had a desire to experience what he considered to be stardom, along with all its benefits. He wanted his 15 minutes of glory, just as he has seen well-known movie stars, singers and sports personalities receive.  Fame and fortune, only without the hard work and struggles to get there.

So, this young man set out to accomplish his goal. He first changed his appearance to look cool. He then got together with a group of his friends, and walked through Central Park in New York City. The young man, donned in his cool outfit, new hair-do, and sunglasses, and played the part of a well-known, popular star of some sort. His friends played the parts of bodyguards and news photographers.

Before long, a crowd began to gather, each wanting to see what all the hubbub was about. All it took was one question from the so-called news people, and it was all over. This was a star ... in their very own presence! The fake "news people" conducted "interviews" with the folks in the crowd, who "remembered" seeing this young man in what he (the on-looker being interviewed) thought was his first movie. "I thought he did a good job!" said the man being interviewed. Another remembered hearing the "singer/star's" song. "I liked it!"

As you can guess by the title of this blog, none of these supposed accomplishements by the star-wannabe ever actually happened! The kicker was that all this commotion created a buzz, and the guy actually ended up as a news headline on Good Morning America!

Are we that enthralled with stardom, that we can believe in even the fakes? Why is it that we can be so gullible  as to believe anything that comes down the pike? I can speak this story because I was one who was gullible ... naive ... as a child. I know the feeling of being taken in, and I know the pain of defeat, dissappointment and betrayal. I remember the moment when all that left me. I was a young woman at the time, in a crowd of my peers at a Tom Jones concert. The concert was held in a circular building, and Mr. Jones had to run down an aisle to get to the stage to perform. Before he did that, his bodyguards lined both sides of the aisle, linked arm-in-arm all along the way. I remember thinking, "How rediculous! These are not screaming teenagers ... these are men and women! What do they think will happen?" Well, I was in for a shock. These folks were just as wild, and just as dangerous, as any concert I've ever seen! Bras were being thrown into the aisle, and the bodyguards had all they could do to hold the crowd back!

Well, at least Tom Jones was a real star. Unlike the young man in GMA's news story, Mr. Jone's popularity was well-known and deserved. 

We believe. Yet we seem to have so much trouble believing truth! We fall for just about anything, but we question, discuss and even argue and fight over issues that are important. Especially about issues concerning spirituality.  "You believe what you want to believe, and I'll believe what I want to believe, and we'll tip-toe through the tulips together." All in the name of peace and acceptance.

Here's the thing: It doesn't matter what you believe, or what I believe. What matters, and what's important, is what GOD says! He is God. He's not going to adjust Himself for humanity. We are to "adjust ourselves" to His thoughts and His ways. Ok, running and screaming because a star (or a supposed "star") is in your midst is not going to get you into, or keep you out of, Heaven. But there are important issues and beliefs that will! We need to get back on track and know what GOD says about all that. 

I Can't Get Away With Anything!

I'm tellin' ya ... I can't get away with ANYTHING! Every time I try, I get caught.

My insurance company did something today that I totally did not understand, so I called to ask them about it. What started out in the form of a question and a plea for help, turned out ... well, let's just say, it wasn't pretty. After the conversation, I set out to finish the rest of my errands. Along the way, I drove past a church with a sign out front that read, "DON'T FIGHT OVER NOTHING." Lol! NO JOKE!!! That's what it said! I guess God's not finished with me yet. He's trying to teach me how to become a warrior, but some of the fighter in me popped up instead.

Do you know the difference between a “fighter” and a “warrior?”  There is a huge difference, you know. A fighter is a very unorganized, uncontrolled brawler.  To give you a picture of what a fighter is, I’ll use an example from the old-timey western shows that we used to see on TV. You’d see two cowboys at odds with one another in the saloon. They would start punching at each other, and before you know it, everybody in the room is in a pile on the floor, each one doing his best to pound and beat the other with their fists … without even knowing why or who or what started the fight! A fighter is usually controlled by something other than him/her-self. Most often, it’s something like anger or fear or revenge. Therefore, a fighter usually has a good chance of being defeated.

A warrior, on the other hand, is a well-trained, finely-tuned "instrument" who is usually following directions or orders from his or her leader. A good example of a warrior is a soldier. A soldier is well trained, from boot camp on throughout his/her military career.  A soldier knows the who, what and why of his battle.  Anger, fear and revenge have no part in a warrior's actions; the warrior knows how to supercede his/her emotions and act on the word of the one who is in charge. Because the warrior is much more in control than the fighter, s/he has a much better chance of winning the war.

You know, God gave us spiritual armour (Ephesians 6: 11 - 17) for a reason. There's a battle on! A real war! And the last place we need to be is in the shoes of a "fighter" ... out of control and not even knowing who or what we're fighting about.  What we really need is a "warrior's" heart, discipline, self-control, obedience and knowledge of who we're fighting and why, if we're going to win this war.

Be aware of the enemy's tactics. I missed it this morning, and fell right smack dab into the enemy's trap. I fell into the old "fighter" mode, instead of standing on what the Lord is teaching me about being a "warrior." Nothing changed with the insurance company. Nothing was rectified. But driving by that church and reading that sign, "DON'T FIGHT FOR NOTHING," reminded me that I need to pick my battles. Not everything deserves my "attention." The Lord is still leading, and still the One I need to look to for my "marching instructions." He caught me in the middle of my humanity, and reminded me Who I belong to, and Who I represent. A good lesson learned.

And, a word to the wise ...

7 More Book Marketing Tips

#3  Marketing post

7 Weekly Book Marketing Goals You Can Adopt Today - (original post from Marketing Tips for Authors.)

Sometimes it seems like there are so many tips and suggestions for building sales of books that it is difficult to focus on anything. Several years ago this post arrived in my email inbox. When I have a great email like this, I usually put it in a folder in my email account marked as "best of marketing tips".

I know that I rarely open that folder, so I make myself write it down in a journal where I keep all things that are book related. That way, there is a chance that I actually will stumble upon it when I need a refresher course on what I need to be doing.

I suggest that you practice doing a few things well, before you try to tackle a whole book of things. The things that were suggested in the previous posts that I have written here are things that need to be done (website, postcards, relationships with authors and bookstores, etc) so don't throw those suggestions out. Theses are ideas that must be attended to each week:

1) Have a guest on your blog or be a guest on another blog. (This can be an interview of someone or an article someone writes for you.)

2) Comment on 10 blog posts. ( 10 different blogs) You only have to do 2 per day for 5 days.

3) Subscribe to 1 new blog per week to expand your knowledge base.

4) Implement 1 SEO strategy into your blog or website.

(SEO=Search Engine Optimization. It is important to make sure you are giving your blog or website the best chances at feeding the search engines. This is important to make sure searchers find your site when they are using keywords.

You don't have to be technical expert to implement simple SEO techniques. A quick visit to Google, YouTube, or even the search feature on your blog will give you easy things you can do each week for SEO.

This past week, I wrote an article for The Amarillo Christian Life Examiner. They were wanting content about people who are preparing for the end of the world in 2012. They said that writers didn't have to believe that the end was coming, but to do an article on your observations or beliefs...just something to do with this. The keyword they wanted us to use was 'preppers'. This would be a SEO. People who are looking for this kind of thing will see this article in the list of sites that have to do with this subject. Also, when I do an author interview, some of my keywords for the article to be found are always the author's name and titles as well as my name and genre. I will also include the words that describe the main points of the interview. This drives readers to my blog.

5) Help one author promote their book. (Share their book content on facebook, retweet a post about their book on twitter, do an interview, or do a review of their book on major book sites on the web.)

6) Introduce yourself to one new leader in your book's nich topic or genre.

Elaine Littau, author and book marketing coach 

Where Would You Be Now?

Have you ever wondered what life would have been like if you had followed the dreams you had as a little child?

In sixth grade, our teacher asked us to write a report about what we wanted to be when we grew up. A typical question for that age, intended to plant "seeds" and cause us to begin thinking about the future. I remember as a senior in high school, one night as I lay in bed, meditating back on that question asked so long ago. So much of "life" had passed by throughout those six long years. Having grown from childhood to being an adult, my much more "mature" (lol!) thoughts at that time ran along the lines of: I've lived at home all of my life, how can I possibly know what there is out there to do? There's so very much out there, how can I really know what I want to be? There's so much to try, how do I know what I really like? Will I enjoy my work? Where will I end up? And on and on. I fell asleep as my mind whirled in typical tornado fashion over the prospects that lay ahead.

The confusion I felt at that moment somehow superceeded the confidence I felt as a sixth-grader. Back then, I knew what I wanted to be. I had much more of a grip on my future as a child, than I did as a "mature" senior! And I was headed in that direction! I wanted to be a nurse. A "feminine" profession, you say? Typical for little girls to dream of? Maybe so. But in those days there was not as much stereo-typing going on as there seems to be today. Girls wanted what they wanted, just as did little boys. And I wanted to be a nurse.  I guess even back then a desire to help others was inbred into the very core of my being. Until that fateful assignment, that is.

The classroom filled with students, we all sat on the edge of our chairs as we listened to each report. Some of our classmates were filled with goals and dreams that reached all the way to the sky. Some were a bit more realistic. Some took the assignment as a joke. Others shared their hearts.  One student in particular affected my life forever.  He'll never know how my life changed that day.  His report went something like this: He wanted to be a surgeon. When asked why, he said "because I want to cut a man's leg off and watch it roll into the basket."

Ewwwwwwwww ... all of a sudden, my life-time goal of becoming a nurse changed. I wanted no part of it! I tore up my report (which I hadn't yet given before the class). My new life-time goal became flying. I wanted to become an airline stewardess.  (They were not called flight attendants until many years later, as the typical stereo-typing progressed.) As it turned out, I never got to engage in that profession either. At the time, requirements for the profession prohibited marriage, and I got married right out of college.

I look back on those days now with a smile on my face.  But there has also been a question in my heart ... what would life have been like had I followed my original dream? You see, now I know what God has called me to do. I will be building and operating assisted living facility/ranches. (See http://www.gentlespringsofhope.org/ourvision.html). Assisted living requires some amount of medical care. While I do have a certain amount of medical common sense, I was never trained and disciplined in the field as I now believe that God had wanted me to be.  Because of this direction that He has headed me in, I am convinced that God's plans and purposes for my life cannot and will not be thwarted. But I must admit that I've wondered if I had "cooperated" with what was originally planted in my heart, would that cooperation have in some way altered His plans for the better.

What about you? What would your life be like if you had followed your original dreams and goals? Be encouraged ... it's never too late! Take your life-time experiences and turn them in the direction you had originally planned to go.  Trust me ... God can take all your hopes, dreams, desires, experiences and skills gained along the way, and work them together for good!

The Miracle of Forgiveness

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Why do we struggle so much to forgive someone when we are hurt by them? Why do we struggle to receive forgiveness for our own wrong doings? We have a hard enough time receiving God's forgiveness, yet it seems even harder to forgive ourselves for what we do wrong. Forgiveness seems to be a major issue in our world today. Why is this so?

Well, here are a couple of reasons. The first takes us all the way back to the Garden of Eden. When Eve ate the forbidden fruit, and Adam followed in kind, their first reaction was shame, as is evidenced by the fact that they tried to cover their nakedness (their sin) with fig leaves. Their second reaction was fear, as is evidenced by the fact that they hid themselves from God when He came into the Garden for their daily walk and talk. Shame and fear ... that's what sin produces!

We humans were never designed to carry that load! It's hard to come out from under such a weight. To give you a picture of why this is so, take a look at your body. When your body is hurt, bruised, cut or injured in some way, its natural reaction is to tense up, in a subconscious effort to resist the pain. The same thing happens in our emotions. When we are hurt, either by the actions of others or by our own wrong doings, our emotions "tense up" to resist the negative impact. We balk! And we respond not with fig leaves, but with "walls" (of anger, fear, shame etc.) because we don't want to be hurt again. This "resistance," whether conscious or subconscious, actually keeps our physical bodies and/or our emotions in bondage to that pain for an even longer period of time!

The second reason why it's so hard to forgive and accept forgiveness, is because we really don't understand what forgiveness means. In order to gain some insight, let me first explain what forgiveness is not:

Forgiving does not mean ignoring the offense. If the offense is ignored, it's basically the same thing as saying that it never happened. How can you give or receive forgiveness for an event that never occurred? Forgiveness does not mean there is no penalty. There is a consequence for every action, good or bad (or lack of action).  Remember, Jesus had to pay the ultimate price so that we could be forgiven!

Also, forgiving someone does not mean that you automatically forget, although forgiving someone in the true sense of the word does bring a release and peace to your mind, and perhaps even enough healing that you would not focus on the trauma as much. But some events are impossible to forget (like the untimely death of a loved one). But you can still forgive. Forgiving someone is also not an acceptance that what was done is ok. It's not ok!! And you do not have to "like it" in order to forgive. Forgiving someone does not mean that you automatically trust that person again, or that things will be ok now, OR that you have to remain in a hurtful situation. Forgiving someone is not an open door for continued mistreatment!

When you forgive someone, you excuse them. You pardon them. You release them, meaning that you no longer hold them accountable for their actions. That's a blessing for the one forgiven, but it's even more of a blessing for you! When you forgive, it releases you from the horrible bondage of pain, anger, bitterness ... and all those other negative emotions that profoundly affect your physical well being. It releases you to have room in your mind and heart for peace, joy and love.

Forgiveness is not based on our "feelings." It is based on a conscious choice made by the power of our will. What if we don't "feel" like forgiving? That's when choice comes into play. Even though we can't control all situations or circumstances in life, we can control how we respond to them! What if we forgive, but we don't "feel" any better? What if we feel that what we or they have done is just too awful? This is a classic case of the condemnation that God's enemy and ours, Satan, would have us fall prey to. But once again, we do have the power to choose ... will we believe and respond to truth? Or to our roller-coaster feelings?

Forgiveness given or received is a true miracle. There are no "keys" to fixing every wrong done to us or by us, in our lifetimes. But in terms of healing and restoration, forgiving comes as close as is humanly possible!

As always, you are invited and encouraged to join this blog, and share it with family, friends & associates.